Eric Colville: Music

• MP3 play whole song, hi-fi (broadband)

This song couldn't decide what it was about until I realized that I was constantly thinking about my failed relationship with my father. After many years believing that "someday" it would be better, I had to face the fact that it wasn't going to be. No Hollywood ending for this sad film.

and so fantasies are low percentage dreams at best
but it doesn’t mean that I don’t nurse a few
it’s hard to say the words out loud but I confess
sometimes it seems the sweetest dreams are the one’s that won’t come true

Now I’m 35 and thinkin’
I’ve wasted all my time
Trying to find the light to make this darkness shine
I was thinking that the day would come but now those days are gone
I’m 35 and thinking that maybe I was wrong

Maybe I was

If fool were just another word for stubbornness
Well then I don’t go by any other name
As the last to know and one
who would not second guess
It hurts so bad to find out I was never even in the game

I’m 35 and thinkin’
I’ve wasted all my time
Trying to find the light
to make this darkness shine, shine
Even fools like me can only fool themselves so long
I’m 35 and thinking that maybe I was wrong

Now I’m not proud
to say out loud how stupid I can be
To drive real fast past
every screaming neon sign I refused to see
The ugly truth was evident to everyone but me
Guess some things were never meant to be

I’m 35 and thinkin’
I’ve wasted all my time
Trying to find the light
to make this darkness shine, shine, shine
Even fools like me can only fool themselves so long
I’m 35 and thinking that maybe I was wrong

Maybe I was, maybe I was, maybe I was, maybe I was